Confidence
You must have confidence. You must believe in yourself if you expect others to believe in you.
However, you can´t have poise and confidence unless you´ve prepared correctly. (Remember that failing to prepare is preparing to fail.) Every block in the Pyramid of Success is built on the others. When all are in place, poise and confidence result. You don´t force them to happen. They happen naturally from proper preparation.

Sing your song, don’t let the bastards get you down. ~Garrison Keillor

Better living through chemistry

Perhaps it’s because of the abundance of rational reasons to dislike Clinton -– perfect for disguising any unsightly misogynistic blemishes -– that many women described frustration at being unable to name specific instances of what they have felt as gender bias.

Not everyone feels that the chauvinism aimed at Clinton is subtle. Thirty-three-year-old actress Molly Ward said, “There is a frustration I feel professionally about how women who are ambitious are perceived as ruthless. We’ve made rules, we’ve set standards, we’ve put Virginia Woolf on the curriculum, and done things to make women feel it’s OK to go after your dreams. But there is still this basic problem with women being criticized for ambition.”

In today’s United States, racism continues to have more damaging economic and social structural implications for African-Americans than sexism has for women. Especially white and well-educated women, who are catching up to their male counterparts, if not in terms of equal pay or domestic expectations or secure reproductive options, at least in their ability to pursue the education and vocation they desire. And that makes them a more threatening group to the population of white men who have enjoyed unchallenged power — in the White House and other workplaces — since the birth of the nation. Those who feel the army of tough ladies breathing down their necks, competing for jobs and salaries and refusing to drop out of the race, are the population of privileged white men from which the elite portion of the Democratic Party is built.

That does not mean that all privileged white male Democrats are sexist, anymore than it would be true to suggest that all working-class white Democrats (the segment of the party that is breaking for Clinton) are racist. But a lightly disguised uneasiness with female power, as well as the “we love women, just not that woman” rhetoric will be familiar to anyone who has paid attention to the reception of the feminist movement. It’s the movement of which Clinton has become emblematic -– not because it was her bailiwick, but because she has been exactly the kind of woman that feminism made room for: ambitious, ball-busting, high-earning, untrained in the finer arts of hair care, and unwilling to play dumber (or nicer) than she is.

These women –- and the movement whence they sprang -– have never been the most popular girls in the Democratic Party, even if the party’s male elders have grown up enough to know that they’re not supposed to say so out loud anymore. At least not until they find themselves pinching Clinton’s cheek like Chris Matthews, or accusing her of destroying the party by staying in a race in which she is still competitive. It’s like how Democrats love women, just not those goddamned women with their single-issue reproductive rights obsession that sticks us with Lincoln Chafee and Joe Lieberman.

In fact, it’s possible to envision a way in which, rather than simply sealing the demise of the second-wave, this election might give birth to a new generation of young feminists awakened by the harsh treatment of Hillary -– on their own terms and without the voices of Steinems and Morgans to overshadow or boss them.

“When the election started, I felt very postfeminist,” said Wiegand. “I felt like, I’m a woman and I’d love to have a woman president, but I also have many other issues I care about and the Iraq war is a big one, and I’m not going to make my decision just because I’m a woman.” But over the course of the campaign, Wiegand said, “there has been a lot of anger toward Hillary that’s felt really intense and misogynistic. The gloating after Iowa was something to behold. And it’s made me realize we are still dealing with the gender issue. I don’t think we know what to make of women in power, or make of Hillary. I don’t think the world is as postfeminist as I was feeling that it was.”

Meanwhile, “we have outperformed our male colleagues at school only to be slapped hard in the real world.” Women, she notes, earn less than male peers, run only 12 of the Fortune 500, do the brunt of the housework (to say nothing, I might add, of the even more “grinding” types of oppression).

Where is feminism when we (still) need it? I don’t know. Where are parents teaching their kids about Gloria Steinem and buying them subscriptions to Bitch?

Von Hahn, to her credit, answers that question herself: “The hard truth is that we have failed to impress upon our own daughters that women’s issues still matter.”

“Acknowledging you’re a feminist is an act of gratitude for the people who went before you and fought for the rights that you’re now enjoying.”